faz-in-a-box's Diaryland Diary
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
because i'm not bitter
i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter.i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter.i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter.i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter.i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter.i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter.i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter.i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter.i will not be bitter. i will not be bitter.
it should have been me dammit! >:( but, no, i'm gonna put on a happy face and pretend like i'm not bitter.
:D
6:41 a.m. - February 17, 2007
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
when shit gets shitter
you know what scares me sometimes? how can two people be filled with such hatred towards each other, that in a moment of such fury, they are willing to kill each other with their bare hands. reason no longer appeals to them, just a blinding hate to lash out and hurt the other person in the way that they feel they've been hurt.
and you know what makes me laugh? i've become so cynical that even when things seemed to be looking up, i knew it was only a matter of time before things crashed again. i refused to hope that maybe, just maybe, things would work this time. and hey, would you look at that? i was right.
oh well, who am i to get in the middle? i was told to stay out of it :p
3:42 p.m. - February 16, 2007
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
i love me
Good morning world!
Happy Valentine's Day!!
love,
Faz
ok, ok, i dunno what it is, i just woke up in an exceptionally good mood today. and not because i have a honey to cuddle up with later, indeed, i doubt there are going to be any flowers this year like there were last year. but still, i'm in a good mood. i was woken up with a 'happy valentines day' text by a friend and it was followed by a couple more wishes from my friends. i love those guys :D
tonight won't be spent eating ice-cream and wishing i had a dude (lol, like i've ever done that but hey) instead the girls and i are going to paint the town red!
5:48 a.m. - February 14, 2007
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
faz's boy drama of the week
so the faz drama of the week has involved a certain guy who i've had a bit of a secret crush on. and i'm probably overanalysing everything but so help me, just when i had given up any hope that he might fancy me in any way whatsoever (because i figured i just wasn't his type; his type being skinny chinese chicks) he asks me if i was free on friday night.
i tried to play it as coolly as i could and mentioned that i was.
only, the conversation was interrupted and it never picked up again!
so i couldn't help but wonder: why on earth would you ask someone if they were free and not have a follow-up question to it? if it was just making conversation you would have asked if they were doing anything interesting over the weekend but to specifically say "i want to know if you're free on friday night" seems to imply that there was going to be a follow-up statement, like perhaps an invitation to do something with them. i dunno, correct me if i'm wrong but i don't think thats an unnatural assumption.
so now i'm plagued with the what if. what if he was about to ask me out? and if so, how come he never came back to ask later or the next day? could he have started to ask, then changed his mind mid-way?
gah! and i probably wouldn't have been so nutty about this only, i did have a bit of a thing for him and it was only last week when i was telling my friend that its probably nothing and he just isn't interested in me at all so i was giving up. and now there's a bloody seed of hope and i'm trying not to get too excited.
lol, oh well. i guess we'll wait and see.
4:43 a.m. - February 10, 2007
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
iPod
i know its not my birthday yet but i already got myself my birthday present!!
aaah!! i love it! i've been holding out against the iPod for such a long time, not wanting to join the dark side but really, how could i fight this any longer? its so slim, and so pretty, and its got my name engraved in the back. and as if that wasn't great enough, a part of the money i paid for it goes to helping people in Africa.
i love my new iPod. i can't believe it took me this long to get one!
4:31 a.m. - February 10, 2007
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Corporate Lunches
My boss-to-be called me yesterday to ask if i was free for lunch today and nevermind that i had a class at 2pm, i said of course.
i was told to meet at the office so i showed up at 12 sharp and waited at reception till we were ready to go. two of the current pupils met me and we headed to the rendevous hotel together where we met up with my boss-to-be, another member of the corporate team and this other dude who was due to start when i was this may.
lunch was pretty nice. we went to an indonesian restaurant and there was a joke about how they were trying to get us prepped up for the job ahead seeing as a number of their clients were indonesian. at least the food was quite yummy so no complaints there :) and the lawyers seemed geniunely nice and i loved the comraderie between them. can't say as much for the pupils though, but then again, i guess they had their own little thing going. they seemed to already know the other guy and i did feel a bit extra but it was all good. i'm sure i'll get to know them better in good time.
all in all, it was a good experience. i had a brief moment of questioning when i wondered what the hell i'd gotten myself into as the lawyers shot through some work stuff in the first 20mins but after the atmosphere relaxed, i really enjoyed it. i'm actually looking forward to starting work, as crazy as that may sound!
10:53 a.m. - February 08, 2007
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
a rite of passage for any woman
OUCH!!!!!!!!!
if there was one thing going through my mind today it was that. why in the fuck would anyone wish to subject themselves to such pain was beyond me, and yet, there i was, subjecting myself to, err, such pain.
i kept telling myself that it was supposed to be worth it but worth what, i wasn't entirely sure.
yes, i got a brazillian bikini wax today.
yes, i know, ouch! and i seriously mean, OUCH! nevermind that i had some stranger seeing me down there and spreading some thick gooey liquid all over the area, she then rather unceremoniously proceeded to rip it all out.
fuck me, it hurt!
but funnily enough,it only hurt during the process. as soon as it was over, there was no after pain that i was half expecting to endure. none of that discomfort when sitting down or crossing my legs. i thought the skin would feel sore but it doesn't . its just smoothness. still, its a good thing i won't need to be doing this again for at least another month or two.
it feels oddly light now. and strange to actually be able to see the skin under the hair after all this time. i'd almost forgotten it was there.
2:46 a.m. - February 07, 2007
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
le sigh
well, today was my driving test and there are no prizes for guessing that i didn't make it. lol, so much for my car dreams. but what really kicked me in the nuts when i was down was when the tester said, and i quote, "you're actually a good driver".
wtf and double wtf.
ok, so the truth was i failed coz i was so damn nervous that i nearly missed a turning into this tiny road and when i did, my car was too aligned to the left and so when i had to do the directional change thing, my front left wheel brushed the curb. that, apparently, counted as a major bad and what pushed it over the edge into fail territory was not dropping a gear when i got to a road hump (i mean, i have never done that! i've never been told to either! who the fuck does that?!?! wtf!!!) which apparently counted as failing to prepare for a hazard or something like that.
so boo.
it also sucks that everything else was perfect. i so nailed that parallel park and reverse parking. i killed the s-course. and that slope was my bitch. not to mention my on-the-road driving was awesome to the point the dude said "you're actually a good driver".
yes, i is bummed but i'll get over it. my next test is in may and this time, i'm going to kick ass. that directional change won't know what hit it. and that hump, i'll drive over it so slowly gently it won't even know i was there! plus, it'll be my second time so there'll be none of this unofficial "lets be extra strict to the first-timer" bollocks which i've heard is very common.
anyways, after failing, i took the BUS to town and went shopping to cheer up :D
**NOTE TO SELF: STOP going to forver 21. just stop it faz. you know everytime you go in there you never come out empty handed. nevermind that all the tops there are super cute! you can't blow my entire allowance on clothes! i said no. don't try to argue with me! >:|
ahem. yes. i also got a new perfume :) now i smell purty too.
still can't drive though >:(
12:38 p.m. - February 02, 2007
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
other diaries: |